Truck Dhina Dhin.

My fascination with trucks goes back to the days of Terminator-2. This was when the T-1000 (Mercury-Guy) chases Arnold, who is riding a Harley Davidson, and still catches up with the Harley with immense ease. This was the first time when I felt the amazing power granted to the person behind the wheels of these vehicles. In India, since childhood we were used to see trucks totally overloaded, managing to barely crawl their way through traffic not leaving much differences to spot between them and bullock carts. However this was different, it was the first time I felt awestruck by a truck. And then it started, I started noticing trucks along with all the other luxury cars shown in all the Hollywood movies. Well we did try showing our own Indian trucks pulling off some stunts in Bollywood movies, but those didn’t really seem logically plausible. The most memorable one was in the movie “Road”, when Manoj Bajpai chases a Tata Safari driven by Vivek Oberoi and rams the truck into the Safari. At that scene even my pet cats stopped watching the movie. Anyway, moving on, then came numerous Hollywood movies presenting a show-stopping display of the power of their trucks in their movies like Terminator-3, Die Hard-4, Transformers to name a few. So when I arrived here in the US, along with the Audi’s, the BMW’s, the Merc’s, the Lexus’s and countless more awesome cars I was also impressed by the trucks which I got to see. On my way to Columbia, I saw numerous trucks some big, some bigger, some huge, some humongous, some driven by women, and all of them nicely lit so that everyone can identify them accurately in the night. Obvious cause they are powerful, fast and quiet. And that is when American Trucks got added to my list of things to photograph in the States, in order to send back home, along with the other cars and the hot babes. ;-)

Over the next few months, I never really got a chance to photograph anything impromptu. Partly cause I don’t own a camera (Yes I don’t, no need to give that expression of surprise) and partly because none of my friends who have a camera carry it around everywhere. So when we decided to take a trip to the Lake of Ozarks, I was the one who suggested Sandeep to take his $550 camera (excluding accessories) so that we could take lots of pictures of us and the cars on the road. As Sandeep was going to do the driving, it was me who had all the exclusive rights to the photo coverage of the trip. So as soon as our trip commenced, I started off on a clicking spree shooting everything that moves or does not move or in short, everything. Sandeep in the mean time was busy driving at the maximum speed limit of 70 MPH and even then somehow we were the slowest car on the road. The tomato red, Ford Focus (OURS), speeding at 70 in the right lane and still all other cars were cruising past us from the other lane. Damn! That makes you feel like a loser already. Still I kept urging to keep the car below the maximum limit. Much better to get overtaken by even the most pathetic pick-ups on the road, than shell out $100 to the cops.

Soon the trip became merry as the sound system of the car was awesome, Sandeep got to do what he likes the most – drive. Nitali got to do what she likes the most – gossip with Sandeep. Santosh got to do what he likes the most – listen to senti songs of Aashiqui on the iPod. And me? I was reminding Sandeep of the speed limit, gossiping with Nitali, listening to songs with Santosh and doing all these low-priority tasks while taking snaps at a rate of 22 snaps per second. Why 22?? Try Wikipedia.

Suddenly there it was - a bottle green truck, much more magnificent than any I have ever got to photograph and it was right in front of us. I immediately told Sandeep to drive past him at the smoothest pace that he could manage so that I could get a steady shot. As we passed by the truck, we were looking in awe at the mere size of it. It was so huge that our car was just the size of its two wheels put side by side. As we overtook it, I managed to get the perfect shot.

I was so happy that I started showing everyone my brilliance in the art of photography. In the meantime, the truck driver saw me take a snap and was wondering why I was taking snaps of the vehicle. Now such a truck however magnificent it was for me was still a very normal thing for an American like him. His thoughts were running haywire and I bet he thought we were either planning to blow up his truck, or rob his truck or God knows what else was going on through his mind. Me on the other hand/car was thinking about taking more snaps in order to get the perfect shot. I turned around and took 2 more shots of his truck. Now he went mad, he started gaining on us in order to make us pull over and ask for an explanation. We saw the truck driver gaining on us. I was even more happy cause I was getting better shots, which drove him even more mad. On a highway of 70, we were doing 70 and he was doing 90. And what better time that this for Sandeep’s self respect to kick in. Sandeep announced – In my living history, I have never had a truck overtake me and it shall never happen in the future – and started driving as fast as he could. This was it for the truck driver, first we were taking snaps and now we were not letting him overtake. He used all the muscle of his machine and came up to our side. This was when we realized that it wasn’t a good idea to challenge his ride with ours. Sandeep relaxed on the steering wheel and we allowed the truck driver to pass. And all this while, I was still taking snaps of the truck.

Now it was his time to get on top, after overtaking us he came into our lane and started slowing down. We tried overtaking him and he immediately came into our lane. We tried overtaking from the other side, he came into that lane as well. So we stayed in his lane for some time and then he started stopping the truck. That is when we realized that this guy was making us pullover. Now why would this guy want to make us pullover, was the question we were asking us. Maybe he was upset cause of the snaps, maybe he was upset because he wasn’t allowed to overtake us but like my knowledge had been enriched from the Hollywood movies, all I could think about was the movie – The Fast and The Furious – when the truck driver is carrying a shotgun, because there are cases of thefts on trucks, and when he shoots the crap out of Vin Diesel’s friend. Then someone managed to look at the terrain outside which was lonely till miles away, maybe he was going to mug us. Maybe he had unwanted stuff in the vehicle and would break the camera; it would cost me $550 + accessories as I was the one holding it. All these thoughts were running in our minds when Sandeep decided he had had enough. The truck had come to a standstill, so Sandeep immediately stepped on the accelerator and tried zooming past the truck. Now it was enough for the truck driver, as soon as he saw us overtake him. He tried to catch up with us. However the heavy load of the truck and the automatic transmission did not allow him to gain speed that fast. Before he could start driving at a decent speed, we were almost a mile away from him.

But I was sure that he would catch up and then what would happen, I dared not think about it. And then Sandeep had a revelation to offer. He hadn’t taken insurance for the car. The rest of the people immediately had their fingernails inside their respective mouths. For the next few minutes our driver drove steadily at 70. And I watched steadily out of rear window for any signs of an approaching bottle green truck which didn’t seem so awesome now. The others got pretty relaxed by now, but I was sure that he would return. And he did, soon we saw him come up from the past the horizon. This was too much for us, we told Sandeep to pull up into a gas station of a nearby town as at least there would be someone around in case this guy came to mug us or tried to kill us. But Sandeep kept insisting that if anything goes wrong we can call 911. Yeah right! As if they would be waiting for our call and would turn up as soon as we called them. But no one could convince Sandeep, he kept driving on. It was not long before he caught up with us again, this time I dared not take any snaps or he would have rammed his truck into our tiny car. We let him pass and he drove on without any signs of wanting to stop us. Now we were really relieved. But Mr. Driver now got more excited and wanted to overtake him one more time. This time when we were overtaking him I saw him gesturing to me through the window. My knowledge of movies made me realize that this was a gesture to pull over. I told everyone that he’s telling us to pull over. After a minute of mutual discussion, we decided to pull over and get this done with. We pulled over to the side of the road and he pulled over a couple of meters behind. And while we were stopping Sandeep forgot to put the handbrake on and the car moved a little. We thought that was it .. the truck has rammed into us from behind!! We looked back but the truck was quite far away. So we properly applied the handbrakes and waited for the truck driver to come out. I was more worried that he might be having a gun, so I wanted him to get down before I got out of the vehicle.

After a few moments of struggling with his door, the truck driver got out of his truck. He seemed in his forties and was huge. He was wearing the type of dress Hardy wears from Laurel and Hardy. Only that he was twice as big as Hardy. We on the other hand, Santosh, Sandeep and me, were the size of Laurel – combined. He came towards us and walked straight towards me. I was holding the camera tight, in case he tried to break it.

Truck Driver: Hey, why the hell are you taking snaps of my truck man?
Sandeep: We are new to this country and this guy (pointing to me) is taking snaps of everything around here.
Truck Driver: [to me]: Why are you taken photographs of my truck man?
Me: [Looking at him]: That’s cause I’ve never seen such a big .. [realizing my mistake and looking towards the truck] truck in my life.
Truck Driver: What is that? A digital camera?? You’ve got film in there??
I took 2 steps to keep a safe distance from him.
Sandeep: Yeah it’s a digital camera.
At that point I was just glad that Sandeep didn’t start giving specification of the camera including the filters.
Truck Driver: So did you take photographs or did you take a video of my truck?
Me:[From outside hurting range, showing him the photos]: Just photographs .. See.
Sandeep: We can delete them if you didn’t like them.
I pressed the camera against my chest gesturing “NO WAYS!!”
Truck Driver didn’t say anything.
We looked at each other for a couple of moments, before the truck driver set off on his way towards his truck mumbling on his way back .. “Just wondering why the hell you were taking snaps of my truck man!!”
Santosh: Have a good day!!

We waited till he reached the truck, lest that he should turn back and start shooting at us. Then when he reached his truck we ran to our car and started moving before he could ram his truck into our car. Soon we were on our way to the Lake of Ozarks. Thankfully we didn’t see the truck for the rest of our journey. We didn’t realize that the stereo wasn’t on for the remaining journey, and I had tucked the camera safely far beyond my reach so that my urge to photograph wouldn’t take over me again. The others soon started chit-chatting among themselves, and a visibly shaken me could just manage one sentence.

“I’m never photographing trucks in my life ever again!!!!”.

LIFE IN A DISCO

...

The most memorable experiences in life co-incidentally are also the most unexpected ones. That is one thing which has struck me in my vast array of experiences in life. Who would expect that last Saturday, when I was surely going to miss the celebration of the Indian community here in Columbia, would turn out to be such a blast? Well, I am scheduled to work every Saturday and all the cultural events have been organized on Saturdays. First I missed the function called India Nite, which was a cultural event filled with songs, dances, merriment and entertainment, which i got to know from people as I wasn’t there. Then I missed the Diwali Dinner, where there was going to be more entertainment and Indian food (My weak point), and I was going to miss it all. I come back from my job, frustrated from standing for 6 straight hours and then cleaning the entire dining complex and to top it doing all these things while the rest were having a gala time at the Diwali Dinner.

So Santosh comes back from the party, and tells me: “ Get dressed dude, we are going out!!”. I look at the clock .. 11:00 PM. But I didn’t care, the day was very frustrating and I didn’t even ask where we were going. Actually we were going to Déjà vu, one of the hottest clubs in town. I never expected such an awesome way to end my day. So within an hour’s time, we were at the gates of the club (10 mins for me to get ready and the rest 50 mins for the girls). And before we went in, Uday told Santosh to take off the hood of his sweater, off his head. Now I was wondering, what the hell is the connection between the hood and entering the club! But to my amazement, I saw a sign out which said, Please do not wear any headgear in the club, except for baseball hats worn straight! No hooded clothing permitted inside. What!! What were they expecting ? Jaadu from Koi Mil Gaya showing up in the club and fainting due to lack of sunshine?????? Anyways, so we entered the club and it did seriously look like a spaceship, just a lot cooler!! (considering the spaceships from Shaktimaan)

Inside the club it was a totally different world in itself. Before entering the club, the atmosphere was cold and chilly, however a couple of passport checks and $5 entrance fees later I felt as if I had come to a totally different planet. The natural environment here consisted of a warm cozy habitat accompanied with loud acoustics interrupted intermittently by the harsh vocals of the DJ. The entire audience was swaying to the beats which were at his mercy. He was the king, ruling his subjects and making them dance to his wish, simply by the touch of a button - actually a lot of buttons and switches. So after we bowed down before the immense power that he possessed, we made a move to the bar. On the way, we noticed the security arrangements. At every strategic point which could be a possible melee venue, were posted huge and I mean really really huge gladiators, casually also referred to as the bouncers. Actually the fascination of WWE wrestlers made my mouth open in awe as I watched their physical presence. People made sure they had their personal space, and no one dared entered vicinity. And so when I realized that I was gazing at them, I made sure that I got out of there as fast as I can, lest they think that I was some mischief maker or even worse in case someone misinterpreted my awestruck look as a sign of interest.

So we headed straight to the bar counter which was the Wall Street of the club. All the people were screaming their orders to the bartender who kept repeating to everyone, “You’ll have to say that a little louder, please”. I guess this was a tactic to make them thirstier, and convert it into more revenues for this self dependent economy. So everyone grabbed whatever they wanted to, no physical references here, and we headed straight for the attraction of the club, the dance floor. However I was too tired to dance, so I took a seat on a nearby table, keeping guard of all the jackets and the drink of a friend. Soon all my friends blended into the jungle while I sat far away from the crowd, watching the moves of each and every species in the habitat.

I watched as everyone was high in their own world, girls and guys alike were dancing as if no one was watching them, and they didn’t care even if anyone was. Then there were these two babes who felt the sudden urge to climb atop the bar table and start their own performance. They were pretty good at it. One of them urged her boyfriend to come on top of the table and just as he was about to climb the table the bouncer pushed him off, just hinting by a gesture that no guys on tables. Now this is particularly true about the bouncer species that they never seem to speak. The entire time they are standing with their hands folded, yet they managed a real-time response of less than 100ms when a situation seemed to be going out of hand. Coming back to the topic, I thought, where in the world has gone the concept of equality? The guys being equal to the girls and all that feminist talk? But then I realized.. why would I want guys crowding the table tops when two more girls can take up that place??? So I cheered loudly as that guy was pushed from the table. And all of a sudden one bouncer came towards me. I thought, it seems to be end of the ride for me as this guy was going to throw me out. He was not quite tall .. just “six” feet and heavily built, he looked like a hippo who had put on a black shirt. But to my relief he had come to pick up empty glasses of people who had not bothered to throw them or half-full glasses of people who had forgotten where their drinks were. He walked over to me and he spoke, yes he spoke, in fact he boomed.. “Is that drink yours?”, then I remembered about the friends drink on the table in front of me. I tried saying yes, but nothing seemed like I had a vocal cord malfunction. I just managed a slight nod and he understood. They surely are experts of non-verbal communication.

But in a short time I was going to witness the star attraction of the night. At the center of the stage was a group of women wildly enjoying the party! One of them was wearing a bride’s headdress so I guessed that they must be having a bachelor’s party. However it was their company which was stealing all the light. It was a male doll with enhanced masculine features, elongated masculine features to be precise. This was too much for me, a group of heavy-weight women enjoying the party with their blessed friend and I was sitting here instead of enjoying the party. So I hit the dance floor with the enthusiasm which was still well short of theirs but was quite a lot for me. I joined the group and danced my heart out, the loud music on the dance floor surely went to the head and made me forget everything about the past or the future. I was high just by the beats and the songs were surely catching up. There were more observations for me on the dance floor than off it. There was this guy who was surely looking gay, who kept dancing his way into groups of guys and then as guys gave him weird looks, retreating his way back to his original location. The bachelor’s party was still working full swing with no signs of fatigue which was impressive considering the Body-Mass-Index. Suddenly there seemed to be this sudden dearth of feminine life form on the dance-floor. On further investigation I realized that all the girls were heading for the table on which only girls were allowed to dance. The DJ clinching this opportunity played the song “I kissed a girl and I liked it” sung by a girl. The crowd went wild and it went wilder when all the 7-8 girls started dancing synchronously to the beats of the song. Everyone was enjoying it when one of the bachelor’s party heavyweights went aboard the table. It took two bouncers, who managed to carry well grown adults out of the club with just one hand, to help this lady on to the table. Very soon the 7-8 hot chicks were replaced by four members of the bachelor party and their plastic friend.

Witnessing this bizarre debacle of interest in the on-table performance, we resumed our dance floor gymnastics trying to make sure that we don’t get carried away by the beats and start a Ganpati dance over there. We were towards the end of the night and the couple dance disintegrated into a free-for-all. People started scattering across the dance floor, however there was this one particular group of girls that impressed me. One of the girls was so drunk that she didn’t realize where she was and what she was doing, however her two other female friends were keeping her away from all the unwanted prowlers who tried to dance with her and on one occasion even asked a guy to maintain a safe distance. But we didn’t mind females who were slowly drifting into our group, and soon it was just Sandeep and I left to take care of all on the dance floor. All of a sudden I felt a hand on my head. I looked behind to check who it was.. to find a girl had accidentally put her hand on my head. So I resumed my dance, but the boyfriend of that girl was in a playful mood, the second time he put his hand on my head. Both of them were well over 6 feet so it wasn’t a problem for either. I looked behind with an amused look but he had more surprises in stock for me. He started pushing his girlfriend onto me, and she was falling over me. I wouldn’t have minded her under normal circumstances, but with her boyfriend right behind her I had no clue what to do. Thankfully this stopped pretty soon, and I forgot about it even sooner as two hot girls joined us from the other side. But before we could praise our luck, the rest of the gang came back to the dance floor and the girls slowly drifted out of focus. Soon enough, the last song of the night was played and before we knew it, it was over. The entire crowd dispersed, and the lively ecosystem was now a barren desert. We made our way out of the club, the chill outside felt more pleasant now. After all it was one more first experience, it was the first time I visited a club in the United States!!!!!!!

Me, Myself, I and HOT BLONDE!!!!!!!

Well, so it is a wonderful Wednesday afternoon. The sun is shining bright, a cool breeze is flowing and the atmosphere is fantastic. And why shouldn’t it be? I am totally screwed by my assignments and all these stupid people with me, with whom I was walking towards our engineering library, could think about was the fantastic weather. Well at this point I would like to emphasize on the fact that our University has got a total of six libraries, like my departmental head said – From now onwards each one of you is a brand ambassador of the University – and I am leaving no stone unturned in letting the world know about the greatness of my University. Anyways, so I was heading toward the library to return a book I had just broken my head on, and the rest were on their way towards the classes. So we parted ways by just saying a gentle bye, as opposed to the hugs and huddles we would have demonstrated had it been India. Well actually we didn’t even bother much about our public display of affection after coming to the States, but having seen two guys kiss in the middle of the streets some days back, we were so freaked out that we didn’t even walk within two feet of each other these days. Pretty bad as compared to when some other guys from our group managed to see two girls kiss at a club!! Damn!! Speaking of bad luck .. can it get any worse?

I kept thinking about how my luck had been kicking me at all the wrong times at all the wrong places, while I took the long walk back from the library to our apartments. But times were about to get better. Then the windows of change blew into my ears whispering ………. “Shhhhhh !! There’s a hot babe behind.. walk straight, stop ogling at other babes on the road and put up a face which makes you look an intellectual.” Well, that isn’t a difficult one for me as the intellectual I am from birth – lahanpanapasun – as I would say. So I kept walking at my normal pace and bid my time, as it would not be long before this babe would walk past me.

Finally after a few minutes this blond babe managed to overtake me, and the world went into “bullet time” (The Matrix style slow-motion). All I could now see was the sun reflecting a golden glare from her hair, and the wind blowing them such that I could see the visible tattoo on her neck/back. And like Shahrukh Khan would have it in “Main Hoon Na”, few people dressed in tuxedos jumped out of the bushes and started playing the violin in the background to the tune of “Dhagala Laagli Kala !!!!!” as the song would perfectly sum up my feeling at that point in time. And this was when I realized what various cultures over the face of the earth have tried telling us for generations, that a person’s mind has two sides – The good side and the evil side, very aptly summarized as The Angel and The Devil in masterpieces like the Tom and Jerry Cartoons. It was when I firsthand experienced the feeling that when a desirable object is within 5 meters of vicinity, the brain tries telling you two different things at the same time – one of which is futile but the right thing to do, while the other is corrupt but the fruitful thing to do. And it is during such times you end up doing something so dumb, which is neither the right thing to do, nor is it fruitful. So as soon as I saw her, the reaction from me and my two minds was:

Devil: WOW!!!! What an item!!!!!!!

Angel: WOW!!!! What an item!!!!!!

Me: WOW!!! What an item!!!!

Well while the two minds have contradicting thoughts most of the times, this was one time when all three of us, me included, had no disagreement on the fact that she was a HOT ITEM!! And for the next few moments I was so mesmerized by her beauty that I don’t remember what my two minds were trying to tell me, all I did was walk behind her while suddenly she turned towards my building. Guess what!! She was going in my building!!!

Devil: Quick, follow her .. Lets strike up an conversation, she looks quite friendly to me .. at least from behind.. ;-)

Angel: Yeah, like our lad here is some Brad Pitt who is going to run up to a female and strike up a conversation without her calling 911 and getting him deported back to India..

Me: !!!

Well at this point of time the thought of getting deported back to India suppressed all my inner urges to go and speak to her, so I just kept walking behind her towards our building.

And now imagine my luck, and it doesn’t have to be my bad luck everytime.. Even though she had arrived some 2-3 minutes before me at the elevators, she didn’t manage to get one before I arrived on the scene.

The Devil: Look man, even the Gods want you to go speak to the female, that’s why she didn’t get the lift. Now walk up to her, smile and say, “Hey, How you doin????”

Angel: Don’t listen to him and make a fool of yourself, just stay here .. wait for the lift and don’t open your mouth, which would then spoil your image even if you had one.

Me: ----- Zip locked my mouth --------

Finally after a wait of what seemed like an epoch, the elevator had arrived. In the meantime I had not opened my mouth even a quarter of an mm, neither had I tried to look at her and smile. I just kept looking towards the ground, waiting for this moment to pass by as soon as possible.

So she got into the lift, and so did I. She pressed the button for her floor and spoke:

HOT BLONDE: Which floor??

Me: [Instinctively] Fourth!

Me to myself: Now wait a sec, did this babe just speak to me???? Even more, was she nice to me?

Devil: See, I told you she totally digs you. Go ahead, “How you doin?”

Angel: Remember what Param-Pujya Dilip Oak Baba had said? Americans are just friendly. Don’t assume anything on her part.

Me: [Managed to blurt out in a very croaky voice] – THANK YOU..

HOT BLONDE: Hey, anyways I am going to the fourth as well, so not a problem at all.

Devil: You are going to lose your chance man, and then you blame luck for not giving you enough opportunities. I wish god had given this chance to someone else. At least it wouldn’t have been fruitless. Come on, speak something .. speak something.

Angel: Don’t listen to him, he’s just going to get you into trouble.

But now it was way too tempting to ignore what the devil was saying, he had a point indeed. But this good voice kept screaming into my head and the confusion was just too much to handle.

Me: So .. you an international student huh???

BLONDE: Huh????

Devil: WHAT???????

Angel: WHAT??????

Me to myself: WHHHAAAAAT????

How the hell did that come out? I mean imagine an Indian guy with a thick Anglo-Marathi accent in the United States of America asking a blonde babe whether she was an international student. What the hell was I thinking? Could it get more stupid than this? I should have listened to the Angel and shut up. It would have at least saved whatever teeny-meeny reputation I had here.

Devil: Cover it up, cover it up. Make up something .. say “How you doin??”

Angel: Enough embarrassment already, don’t listen to him, just shut the **** up, you moron.

Me: Well, actually this building is full of international students so I was wondering whether you are from abroad as well.

BLONDE: [Just smiled].

Angel: (Let a sigh of relief)Phew!! That was close.

Devil: Good one, my man.. you’re the one, and you’re all set to rock. Ever heard of the phrase – Strike the iron when it’s hot????

BLONDE: Yeah, even I was wondering the same thing. It’s all international students over here. Actually I’m from Chicago. Where are you from?

Angel: India!!!

Devil: Tell her, you’re from the land of the Kamasutra!!!

Me: INDIA!!!

BLONDE: Wow that’s nice..

In the meantime we had managed to reach the fourth floor. The door of the elevator had opened, and while I was trying to get out of the lift, there was a moron who was trying to enter the lift with a vacuum cleaner even before we had come out of it. And this was not all, my two minds were not leaving me alone either.

Angel: Okay, that’s enough for one day, say bye and let’s get the hell out of here.

Devil: No way marine, you haven’t come this far to let go so easily. Keep the conversation running. Don’t let it die out. You still haven’t said “How you doin?”, the conversation isn’t complete without it.

Me: [Partially agreeing with the devil, and avoiding the crazy vacuum cleaner guy at the same time] So.. which department are you from?

It was my safest bet, as I’ve realized after coming here that the easiest way to act smart in from of a babe is by telling her that I’ve come here to do my Masters in Computer Science, which would get any female well impressed.

BLONDE: Excuse me? I’m sorry I didn’t get that.

And there comes my Anglo-Marathi accent in the picture. She couldn’t understand my pronunciation of the word “department”. And neither did I understand that here you’ve to ask “Which school?” as every department is a different school. Anyways I didn’t realize it then .. so I go again.

Me: What’s your department?

She: Ohh .. 499 .. pointing in some direction.

Me: ????

A long silence of 2-3 seconds. It was after this time I realized that she had read my pronunciation of “Department” as “Apartment” and she was telling me her apartment number, and was pointing in the same direction.

The devil: Good going man, you rock. Get more details, ask her if she’s free tonight. Ask if you could go over for coffee today evening. She’s giving you her apartment number dude.

Angel: Get it cleared at this instant, that you had nothing to do with her apartment number. Don’t give her any ideas, she might think that you asked for her apartment number even before you asked her name. FIX IT MORON!!

Me: No, no, no, noooooooo …. No ..

And after a couple hundred more No’s ..

Me: I meant “De-partment”.

BLONDE: Oh you mean school??? Ohhhkkk.. I’m doing Journalism.

Now this, according to me, was the conversation breaker. It turned out as the stupidest thing I could have done. While I wanted to impress her by showing here that’s I’m an intellectual Computer Science student, it’s actually the journalism school here which is one of the top school in the entire USA. She had totally swept me over, she was one of the most brilliant minds on campus. And once again I was so overwhelmed by the atmosphere that I could hear any on my minds.. Maybe they had been muted as well.

Me: [Again blurting in a low voice]: Well that’s like the best school on campus.

She: Pleease, you’re just being nice.

Me: ( Just shaking my head indicating a “NO, I’m not”. )

She: Which school are you in?

Me: (In an even lower voice) – Computer Science.

She: Hey, that’s cool.

It didn’t seem quite cool to me now. Again my minds had come out of their brief coma.

Angel: Haven’t you made a fool enough of yourself already? Let go home now.

Devil: I agree, you gotta get out of here dude. Turn around and RUUUNNNNNNNN !!!!!!

Me: [Agreeing to both of them] Anyways, it was nice meeting you. Have a nice day!!

She: Nice meeting you too, take care, bye.

And then we parted.. No hugs, no huddles.. which I wouldn’t have minded in this case. But I was just glad that she hadn’t ripped my intellect to shreds. As I made the long walk through the corridor back to my apartment, I was listening to both the voices telling me what I did wrong and what should I have done. And I was just glad that I had my first encounter of getting introduced to a hot babe on my own. That too a HOT, SMART and INTELLIGENT BLONDE. I was kind of on a roll here.

But wait a sec!!! .. Yeah you guessed it right, if you know me properly you must be dead sure that I must have made a dreadful mistake. And I won’t disappoint you my dear friends. In all the final confusion, I forgot to ask her name. Typical Veerendra .. Right?

Now it has been almost 2 weeks from the incident, I think I saw that babe 2-3 times since then, but there are so many HOT BLONDES here that you just can’t be sure. I try checking for the tattoo on the neck but I just can’t get a proper look to be sure. Anyways I am just glad for this another first time of a new sort, which has left me with a sweet memory and an apartment number.

HIGH FIVE!!! ;-)